I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Randomize
