He told me they were just razor bumps!
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
