My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
