But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
