I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
