he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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