Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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