you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
