Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
