No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
