you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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