so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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