Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
