Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
it glows. i had to have it.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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