If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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