No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
