Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just forgot I was standing up.
i now understand why vodka
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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