So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize