I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
