I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
COCAINE IS GR8
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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