That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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