dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
