u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Did you just see the Batmobile???
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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