u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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