Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
