On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize