My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
