I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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