I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
