He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize