The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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