Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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