what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
