I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
