the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
