we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Help. Why am I so naked?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
