i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
