There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
there is puke in my bra ... again
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