im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
