I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
