He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
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