spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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