I heard we made out
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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