I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
i believe in u and ur pee
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize