That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
