I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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