You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Randomize