I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
