Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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