your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
