it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
