I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
